Where does George Washington keep his armies?

IN HIS SLEEVIES!

That's the most hilarious joke I've heard in a while... other than this one, which is just hilarious because it's so lame:

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

Where's my tractor?

It's just funny because it's not really a joke at all...

Anyway, I'm back from Europe! Everything was super amazing! I would make a really long post about it, but I don't really feel like it.... maybe I'll post some pictures later.

So... that's all for now. I hope you enjoyed the cheesiness.

Kris.

Crazy Stuff

There wasn't an embed code as far as I could tell (which wasn't very far, lemme tell you), so you'll just have to click this link.
I dunno... I thought it was perfect, somehow. Hilarious, too... but fitting?
Actually, I have no idea what I'm talking about. I was at Mavericks Central today (Dallas, Tx- along with every other Mavs fan in the country) for the parade... it was hot, and crowded, and I didn't get to see because the guys in front of me (I was standing at the edge of a fountain, but it was weird... I'll draw a picture) would always stick their arms up and shout "CHANDLERRRR!!" whenever any of the players drove by... but only once was it actually Tyson Chandler.

Alright: PICTURES!

So first there was this girl, who I totally agree with, except when you look around and see this:

It's kind of sad.

These were the crazy Chandler fans standing in front of me, constantly blocking my view of the parade, and here is a bad diagram of the area :)

The single x is where I was standing, the 4 x's are where those crazy guys were standing. All the gaps where I was standing on the fountain represent where waterfalls were. Also, pretend each of the giant purple stick figures represent about the same amount of people in the crowd picture... But there were still a lot more. And the rectangles are buildings. There were people in there, and I was slightly jealous because Texas is hot :( There was probably air conditioning.
Also, the tiny stick figures in the fountain represent all the nasty little children who were swimming around and splashing everyone. (Fountain water is disgusting- don't let your children swim in it, or drink it. Ew.)

But fortunately, I caught glimpses of the players and other various people, so I wasn't disappointed. Today was... hectic, to say the least, but enjoyable at the same time. And one more thing: IN YO FACE, HEAT FANS! hahaha sorry, I couldn't resist :) I really don't care too much for basketball, but I'm happy to see the team I grew up watching finally win.
Anyway, I hope you have an enjoyable rest of your week!
Rian (is not a great artist)

Don'tcha know?

The reason I love this show?
Hilarious people like this guy.

Of course, there are the amazing things like this or this (or even this [it's actually just super cute haha])... but when someone says:
"I've only been impaled with them once or twice in the past... so they're pretty safe."
then I just lose it xD

Rian

Harry Potter > X-Men

So... I found this on Epic Fail, but I don't necessarily see it as a fail. It's actually kind of a win. I like the Cyclops one best.

The only reason this is here is because I just saw X-Men: First Class, and it was awesome. Like really awesome.

There were some super hilarious parts, but I won't say them because I don't want to spoil the movie. :) You should go see it.

Since we're talking about movies, let me just remind you that HARRY POTTER COMES OUT JULY 15th!!!!!!!

I'm so excited! I love Harry Potter so much.... actually, now I want to reread the whole series. I might just do that.

Unfortunately, I'm leaving soon,

and I won't be able to take all of
the books I would need with me. I forgot to tell you, I think.

I'm going to France and Italy. :D

I'm leaving Tuesday around noon and coming back the following Friday. If I can get on a computer, I might post a few pictures for you (those invisible people reading the blog...) while I'm gone. I'm super excited!

Kris

Dinosaurs (and Wikipedia)

Okay, I'll be the first to admit that I am pretty much obsessed with dinosaurs.
Why?
They're amazing, for one, they're also extinct, large, and generally small-brained.
But they're amazing.
I'd have to say that my favorites are raptors (specifically, Jurassic Park versions of velociraptors, which are actually closer to Utah raptors, but whatever), and I've always had a healthy fear of Tyrannosaurs. Recently I've read Jurassic Park and its sequel, The Lost World. I highly recommend them both, because the first two movies do not do them justice, really (and since the third movie was completely random and not good at all, I'm going to ignore it). However, The Lost World scared the bajeebers out of me when I read about the Carnotaurus. The way Crichton described them made me imagine that someone (like Professor X) grabbed a pot and was creating a formula to create an amazing dinosaur. They mixed in a bit of ninja, some cuttlefish, octopus, and chameleon... and then they accidentally added an extra ingredient- TYRANNOSAURUS REX. *cue explosions* And thus the Carnotaurus was formed! Using their ultra-super powers, they would stand still and scare off T-rexes and velociraptors and other dinosaurs because they could be virtually invisible. dun dun duhduhduh duuuh duh (haha sorry, I enjoy watching Powerpuff Girls)! Anyway, yeah. Crichton had me scared to death there for a while, but then I found out that he just made that up, so I'm all good now :] Anyway. I also think that Procompsognathus (compys from here on out) were pretty amazing, too... As are Dilophosaurs, Apatosaurs, and Pachycephalosaurs. Of course, there's always the classic Triceratops, Maiasaurs, and Pterodactyls... but some interesting ones I found were Gigantoraptors and Supersaurs. They just have cool names, really :)

Anyway, yeah. Today, I got Portal 2!! I've been super excited for this game for a while now, and I started playing co-op with my brother. I think I'm gonna play the first one again, though, just so I can play it all straight through. I think it'll be fun. Or maybe I'll play the second one, and then the first one again? I don't know. Either way, I'll probably end up playing them both before summer vacation is over. That, homework, and maybe a trip or two is all I have planned so far... it's going to be... an interesting break, to say the least.

I'll try to post more, I promise! :)
Rian

Sometimes, I think I'm dyslexic

I was at Barnes and Noble and there was a sign:

COLLECTIBLE

EDITIONS

And when I read it, I thought it said:

EDIBLE

COLLECTIONS

Needless to say, I was pretty confused.

To go along with my dyslexia, I've also become horribly clumsy... Yesterday I kicked myself in the back of the leg and cut myself with my toenail. It bled a lot....

I also cut my hand on the car (getting groceries out of the trunk) and scraped my elbow (while getting into the car). I have a lot of bandaids on.

Anyway, that's all. Nothing remotely exciting happened today, so I guess I don't have anything else to talk about...

Kris.

In case you're wondering...

(Which you're probably not, by the way)

I'm a Hufflepuff...

Yeah. You can take the quiz here. I thought it was pretty accurate.

Goodnight.

Kris.

Oh, and by the way, we had an awesome time tonight at our cbox party... We'll let you know about the next one in case you want to join us. :)

You know you want to.... it's fun!

Ungnhh...

That's the noise I make when people try to talk to me when I'm sleeping.

This morning:

Me: asleep in my bed

My mom: not asleep

Mom: hey, kristin, you should go run with your brother.

Me: sleeping

Mom: hey.

Me: unh... what?

Mom: you should go run.

Me: time?

Mom: now.

Me: sleeping

Mom: it's eight o' clock! you have to go before it gets hot.

Me: but it's eight o' clock....

Anyway, you get the point, right? Well, this is my inner monologue while I was running:

Ohmygod, whose idea was this? I knew I shouldn't have gotten up. Why am I here? My ipod ran out of battery. I'm so bored. I feel like I'm going to die. Who thought running was a good idea, again?

Kris.

A long long time ago....

(in a galaxy far far away)

I actually posted.

Well, now that it's summer, I can actually post again!

People always talk about junior year being the hardest, and while I'm not sure about that, I do know that it definitely was the busiest. There really wasn't time to post or think about posting. Sorry.

So... summer! Yay! I can actually stay up late because I want to, and not because I'm doing homework! I've actually been out of school since Thursday, because I didn't have to take any of my exams, but instead of sitting around alone for two stays straight, I decided I would go to school with my mom. She teaches eighth grade. If you don't already know, eighth graders are crazy, especially on the last few days of school.

Amazingly, they did not mistake me for a middle schooler like them, which is what usually happens, but I did get called short, which, honestly, is true. A sixth grader did make kissy noises (yes, kissy noises) at me when I was walking down the hallway, but that was the only really weird (creepy) thing that happened.

Today I started volunteering at the library again. It was pretty fun, mainly because I sat with two of my friends and made paper dinosaurs for the majority of the time.

Anyway, that's my life right now... I'm gonna go to Starbucks. I'll post later.

Kris.